My relationship with my grandfather is… Complicated.
We called my Dad’s parents, Granny and Grandpa. We lived in the west end of Winnipeg and they lived in the north end but we saw them often and regularly. We spent the eve of every holiday at their house eating Ukrainian staples like cabbage rolls, pierogies and schmaltz. They cooked all day! Turkey, ham, meatballs, veggies, head cheese and all different types of pickled items! My Grandpa loved to make every holiday magical with sleighbells on Christmas Eve and “Easter bunny poop” he had found on the front porch.
My memories of him as a child are full of candy, laughing, singing, and happiness. My Sister and I would sleep there for the weekend and we would rent the funniest movies and Grandpa would feed our bellies full of candy that he kept in a giant Rubbermaid garbage can near his chair. He made the most AMAZING silver dollar pancakes in the morning!!! Grandpa loved the horses! Him and I would spend all weekend pouring over stats and race information before placing our bets. Sometimes he would even take me to the track and let me place my own bets at the window! Win, place and show. In the fall we would go over and help dig up potatoes and in the summer we would shuck corn.
My grandparents didn’t have a lot of money but they always had special treats for us, lots of hugs and kisses, and special cards written out by hand from Granny and Grand”poo”
💛.As I got older I realized that my Grandpa and my Dad had a strained relationship. Made even more so by Grandpa’s relationship with my Mom. Before I was born my grandparents were alcoholics and my Dad’s childhood wasn’t all sunshine and lollipops. As children my Dad never spoke of his childhood instead he allowed his children to forge independent relationships with his parents.
Something happened. Granny and Grandpa stopped coming around and we didn’t see them for years. I called them and invited them to my graduation and my Granny was excited to go but my Grandpa took the phone away and said, “I don’t have a granddaughter named Kristin.” I was angry and I was sad. When they sent me a graduation card stuffed with money, I returned it.
A few years later we found out through my Uncle that my Granny was in the hospital and she was about to receive quadruple bypass surgery. Of course, I planted my ass in her hospital room and refused to leave. At first my Grandpa was angry and then… He grew softer. He reminded me of my Grandpa from childhood. As Granny recuperated, I kept on coming back and our relationship continue to grow. After a few months I talked to my parents and I talked to my grandparents and I organized a family get together. After years of no contact it appeared like nothing had ever happened! Whatever anger the adults had, they let go of. Our family relationships picked up where they had left off many years before.
When my parents moved to BC it was up to my Bro, Sis, and I to keep in contact with our grandparents and look after them. Ninja got along with my grandparents very well and even when we were broken up he still went over there to install their air conditioner and to mow their lawn ❤️. Granny and Grandpa loved to come over to the house that Sis and I shared and Granny would called me daily at work just to say hi!
In January 2006 Granny caught a cold that she just couldn’t shake. We knew something was wrong because their visits were few and far between. They blamed it on the weather but even when we went to their house, Granny was frail and Grandpa would carry her to the bathroom from the couch. We knew something was wrong. Grandpa took her to the hospital at the beginning of February and 2 weeks later she passed away of stage 4 lung cancer.
It was the worst day. It was the worst 2 weeks actually! My Sister and I took turns staying there by her bedside and looking after Grandpa. We called Mom and Dad and told them they better come soon. When the doctor told me she would have maybe 2 weeks to live, he asked me to talk with my Grandfather. Apparently, Grandpa was not listening to him and refused to talk to him anymore. It was terrible. I hated seeing him cry. Sob. My Granny was the love of his life and they were inseparable. It was heartbreaking. On the morning that she died it was freezing out! One of the coldest mornings I can ever remember! When I ran out the hospital doors because the walls were closing in and I just couldn’t seem to breathe, my tears froze on my cheeks. I gasped for air and the cold hurt my chest. It was awful. She was the first family member that we had lost.
Grandpa and my relationship was never the same after that. He always blamed me. I think he knew that was unreasonable but his heart was broken and he didn’t care who he hurt because he was hurting so badly himself. My family had a hard time accepting his behaviour and over the years we all grew estranged.
I kept trying though. I invited him to every Christmas and every major event. Ninja and I still visited him often even though he asked us to stop.
It wasn’t until I was pregnant with HBear that I saw him smile again. Right before I was ready to pop I remember going to Grandpa’s house with my Mom and my Brother. Grandpa was even making fun of my big fat belly 😂.
2 years later we were back and my Mom and Dad were with us! I was 6 months pregnant with SBean and we all went over for an afternoon visit. It was the first time that we had all been together since Granny had died. It was a wonderful visit.
Last week he had a stroke. I booked 2 flights out for my Dad and J to go out to Winnipeg for Father’s Day weekend. This Monday he went into congestive heart failure. I booked my Dad a flight out first thing Tuesday morning. Dad spent 2 full days with him. he played a message that I had sent saying goodbye and Grandpa’s lips twitched. I can still make the man twitch 😂. On Thursday at 2:30am my Grandpa slipped peacefully away. I know my Mom and Granny were waiting for him with open arms.
Grandpa could be a hard man. Stubborn to a fault. He was a hard worker, a jokester, a singer, a hunter, a candy junkie, a gambler, a drinker, a wonderful cook, a protector, a marine, a devoted husband, a challenging father, and despite his exterior a loving grandfather with a soft heart.
Goodbye Grandpa. I promise I will only remember the good times and I will let go of the bad. Please give Granny and Mom a big hug for me and look after them. I love you ❤️.
As I am in the process of changing blog hosts, I haven’t been very consistent in my posts lately. I missed last week and we have had a couple long episodes on How Was Your Week, Honey? Part 2 of our New York story came out and then a 2-parter with our RASBesty came out last week as well! Plus an all new episode we just recorded on Saturday! If you have the time… Check them out!
Last week we were fortunate enough to have our RASBesty on for another 2 part episode, check out #121: And You Must Be A History Major Part 1 HERE
Check out #121 – And You Must Be A History Major Part 2 HERE
This week we chatted about old school tequila stories and sneaking out. Check out Episode 122: Assholery HERE
As I’ve said before, we have been trying to adhere to the new Canadian food guide and have more plant-based meals in our diet. So far, most of them have been pasta dishes. I had two packages of Epicure’s Pad Thai seasoning in my pantry so we decided to try them out. I used up whatever vegetables I had in the fridge and it was a hearty meal that everybody enjoyed and nobody even mentioned missing the meat!
Vegetarian Pad Thai
Adapted from Better From Scratch
1 package flat rice noodles
3 tablespoons oil
3 cloves garlic, pressed
2 eggs
1 bag bean sprouts
1 bell pepper, sliced
3 green onions, chopped
1/2 cup peanuts
1/2 cup cilantro, chopped
2 packages Epicure Pad Thai Seasoning
Cook noodles according to package instructions, just until tender. Rinse under cold water.
Mix the sauce ingredients according to package. Set aside.
Heat 1½ tablespoons of oil in a large saucepan or wok over medium-high heat.
Add the garlic, peas and bell pepper.
Push everything to the side of the pan. Add a little more oil and add the beaten eggs. Scramble the eggs, breaking them into small pieces with a spatula as they cook.
Add noodles, sauce, bean sprouts and peanuts to the pan (reserving some peanuts for topping at the end). Toss everything to combine.
Top with green onions, extra peanuts.
2 weeks! I have pictures from the past 2, very busy weeks! The Girls had their class picture day at school, I led my very last Columbia hot lunch, and SBean continued her weekly tennis lessons!