I am going to be honest; I am having a hard time keeping up with life lately.
My Mom’s cancer has come back. And it has spread. I have so many emotions about this that I am having a hard time concentrating on anything else. I mean my first priority is my 2 beautiful girls so of course their stuff is getting done, but beyond that and worrying about the future… I’ve got nothing.
This weekend we had planned a trip to Vancouver, Ninja, the girls, Mom, Dad and myself. Mom had last minute Dr appointments come up and insisted on staying home. I got 3 immunity busting smoothies ready and 12 bean soup and reluctantly we left Friday morning for out weekend trip.
It was a short enough drive. We live about 4.5-5 hours away from friends in Aldergrove. When we got there our Hostess with the Mostess had appys ready and good conversation. Our purpose for this getaway was Mumford & Sons. Ninja got me tickets for my birthday and up until recently I was VERY excited to see them. Ninja and I love music! In our small town we don’t see many, I mean any live shows. Especially an outdoor show with a wicked awesome band! I was very leery of leaving SydneyBean with my Dad and the couple who we were staying with. They have been friends of our family since my Mom was a little girl but they don’t have grandkids yet and they haven’t had to deal with a crying baby in many many years.
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HoneyBear is great but SydneyBean can be a handful. In fact as I write this we are on the drive home and she hasn’t stopped crying in over an hour! I am hoping she will tire soon. We are on the Coquihalla and we are going through a rainstorm… we are driving in a cloud right now and can’t see anything… she needs to stop crying… please.
No luck. So anyways, she was pretty good. She still won’t take from anything but Boobie so no milk and she didn’t want her pureed carrots so she fussed a bit. They went for walks and played on the neighbor’s trampoline and all in all had a great time.
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Ninja and I drove to Surrey and actually found decent parking. It was strange but nice to be in an actual city again. The show was great! It really took my mind off things, as I spontaneously well up quite often right now. Beer tickets were $7.50!!!! But an adult night needs a drink so we hung out in the beer gardens for the opener. Mumford & Sons are great and they played for 2 hours, they were fantastic!
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On Saturday we took the girls to Stanley Park. It rained hard the whole way there but cleared up as soon as we got there J we started at the Mini train. HoneyBear LOVES trains! I said to her “Are you ready to go into the magical forest?” and she said, “Well we can pretend because in the real world Mommy there is no such thing as magic.” Have you ever heard anything sadder? A 4 year old that doesn’t believe in magic??? I asked her where she heard such a thing and she said she just knew. That breaks my heart. I am going to make it my mission to change her mind. We all need a little magic… especially right now.
We walked on the seawall all the way to the lighthouse and to the totem poles.
It was a good hike. A couple kms. When we got to the Totem Poles I set up the tripod to take a family picture. Everytime I do this HoneyBear has a little stubborn fit and doesn’t want a family picture. This has happened before. She refused to take a nice picture. This made me upset. I began to reflect.
I remember family holidays where I pulled that crap. I remember my Mom’s face crumble when I ruined another family moment she wanted to savor. I thought about this and realized I can’t take that back. I can’t make those memories be anything than what they are… and now she is sick. I have a shortened time to make memories with her. That’s all I want to say about that right now.
It was a lovely day at the park.
When we left we thought we would go to Kitts for a nice trendy lunch like we used to have before kids. LOL Traffic on Saturday was MENTAL. When we found the 2 restaurants we wanted to eat at, we realized parking was stupid and the kids were so done with walking. PLUS they cafes were so small the thought of bringing the stroller, the diaper bag and everything else was overwhelming. We turned around and drove to Granville Island.
Yeahhhhh…. Half the population of Vancouver must have been there, Children’s Festival was being set up too. Parking was a joke. After searching for a spot for over 40 minutes we left saying the next place we see was going to feed us. By this point SydneyBean had shotgun pooped up her back, and was crying nonstop. We stopped in a Subway parking lot… we had Subway the night before after the show. I changed the Bean and fed her while Ninja went to get a Subway pizza. Wouldn’t you know it; they are the ONLY Subway that doesn’t serve pizzas. LOL. So he went to 7-11 next door to see what our options were. Yeah, 7-11. Oh man, we got a full pizza for $6 but MAN WAS IT TERRIBLE! LOL
Thank goodness our hosts planned a beautiful dinner for us later that night. After a late night of talking and sipping amazing red wines, it was off to bed. A weekend that was too short to fully escape from reality. Thank you Terry & Jamie!!!
So I am not sure how often the posts will be coming in the next little while. Mom has chemo and radiation starting again this week plus lots of tests. I am planning my sister’s baby shower. It is in Calgary on June 14th! That is exciting and a welcomed brightness in an otherwise dark time.
