I remember those first few days, when she was in hospice. I begged her not to do this.
“Please, don’t do this. Just stay. Don’t go. Please.”
I think she felt the same way. If she didn’t laugh she would have cried until there was no time left,
That makes me sad.. and MAD. This is just so unfair. Yes, I am apparently 5 years old again.
I just want to stamp my foot and shout at the top of my lungs,
“It’s not fair and I just want my Mommies!”
Our last Christmas all together 2012 |
I will pull on my Big Girl Panties and put on a smile and enjoy the rest of my Christmas. Don’t get me wrong, it really isn’t hard to enjoy the festive season when I have so much love surrounding me. I am so blessed and I feel wretched complaining about the one thing I DON’T have, when I DO have so much.
Perhaps it is because my Sis and I have been talking lately and it has brought up some emotions. Or perhaps because I heard from my Mom’s Besty and she told me how much I remind her of my Mom. That email made me so proud and made me so sad at the same time.
You see, that’s what makes it a Hard Candy Christmas…
it is bitter sweet.
****UPDATE: After posting this it snowed… so this morning while Ninja and Dad shovelled we made Christmas trees using mandarin orange papers!
Then, HBear and I wanted to do a few good deeds 🙂 We started at Mom’s! We went up to visit her and brush the snow away from her marker. On the way out we got stuck! I had to use all my Winnipeg techniques to maneuver up the hill to get off the slick incline!
After we left there we went to the Hospice to give them some Cookies. As soon as I got out of the van I got a booter! For all those who don’t know what that is, it is when you accidentally put your foot into a huge puddle and drench your foot!
I guess I won’t be buying a lottery ticket today ;)****
This past week Ninja asked me to guest spot on his podcast Our Liner Notes. It is essentially him and his Uncle, in Texas, talking about their favourite albums. I have never understood albums. I like mixes. I like hearing Les Mis and then Propagandi and then a little Frank Sinatra… but that’s just me 😉
This week the theme was Christmas albums. I picked Kenny and Dolly’s Christmas. Ninja picked A Very Special Christmas 3 and Uncle P picked Wynton Marsalis.
So yeah, it was a LOT harder than I thought it would be.
Every week I listen to the show and then rip discuss with Ninja how he doesn’t tell the right stories or how he doesn’t act like himself lol. I’m all like, “you are just having a conversation with your Uncle. I don’t get the awkward silence???? I don’t get how you “forgot” to tell them that we saw that band in an epic show in Chicago??? You forgot? Seriously?”
So I went on thinking, I got this.
Yeah so not really.
It was super hard! You have this big black microphone in your face and you think about each word you say… not something I am used to I assure you lol. I don’t think I finished 1 complete thought and I KNOW I didn’t tell the stories I wanted to about each of my song picks!
However, all this disappears in the face of their picks.
Ninja’s 1st song was Oi to the World by No Doubt. Not even close to Christmasy! He is all explaining the song about 2 gangs meeting up and I was like,
“to see Santa?”
Yeah, not so much.
The next pick was from Uncle P and he picked the death march, I mean, The Little Drummer Boy. He explained that it was a loooonnnnnngggg march across the desert and that is what The Little Drummer Boy meant to Wynton Marsalis.
I was like, “sooooo he marched across the desert tooooo, see Santa?”
Really?
My 1st song was I believe in Santa Claus.
I’m not sure I will be invited back.
LOL
You can listen to it in all it’s Christmas glory here at
OUR LINER NOTES
I hope everyone has a Super Duper Christmas! Stay safe and have fun Folks!
Today we baked! We have made Peanut Butter Marshmallow Squares and Butter Tarts and today we made Cookies! They are super delicious. I love the texture! Enjoy 🙂 |
M&M Rice Krispie Christmas Cookies
Add in the Red and Green M&M’s. We picked out the red and green ones so we didn’t have as many as we would have liked 🙁 If we wanted blue and orange we would have been golden lol.
Take a spoonful of dough and roll it into a ball. Press the ball down slightly on the cookie sheet.
Bake the cookies until they are golden brown on the bottom and around the edges. It should be 8-10 minutes.